Conspiracy theorists could have a field day

Originally Published: October 21, 2004
By Chris Fowler | ESPN Insider

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    So, the new and improved BCS formula was retooled to emphasize old-fashioned human judgment. Bravo. All the projections pointed to the same top three as in both polls. So, naturally the first BCS standings revealed this week had Oklahoma (a solid second in both polls) third behind Miami!

    A blind e-mail from an anonymous source revealed that, in a secret meeting an at undisclosed location, the unnamed figures in the BCS shadow hierarchy have decided the formula will now be changed again. On a weekly basis.

    Under this new "Flexible Formula," the decimals will be tweaked each Sunday to produce the BCS rankings that produce the least controversial top two and the most TV-friendly at-large teams. To accomplish that, the six computers used in the rankings will be hacked into and reprogrammed weekly. If that doesn't work, the pollsters will be strong-armed into changing their ballots, then forced to sign sworn statements that no such coercion took place. The plan will be incorporated into the fine print of the Patriot Act so it can't be assailed.

    Sorry, Utah. The BCS Man ain't gonna let you get to Tempe or Pasadena. Enjoy Memphis.


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    Chris Fowler

    College Football
    Since 1989, Chris Fowler has been ESPN's primary college football and men's college basketball studio host. He's anchored College GameDay, the network's award-winning Saturday morning college football preview show, since 1990.